So I keep cock blocking myself or the universe is against me

Been doing alright with the ladies until I'll inadvertently say something or do something to fuck it up. I have a past and yeah I'm on pre-trial release doesn't mean I'm a bad guy. I made a lot of mistakes and well when you're like oh I use to do sketchy shit on the regular. Girls get freaked out cause I show no remorse. I did what I did I've learned my lesson and I won't take it back. That shit is over for me. I still have friends who won't change and yes they are a part of my life. Some times I gotta deal with their drama. I don't even know what I'm rambling on about. Whatever I got my life back on track. I'd just like some one to share it with I come on too strong. pfft dating in nyc is stupid every one is looking around the corner something better. Trying to figure it all out.